Bed, Bands and Beyond.

Listening to Ride by The Vines.

Once again, I have it all.

Forced to get inspired for my english class. This entry shall be dedicated to you Dr Carey. HAHA. Of course, when I pass the hard copyof my journal entry this part shall be deleted :)

I can never thank my parents enough. Thank you, thank you, thank yoooouu. *wink*

Christmas shopping went smoothly. Shang cooperated well with me this year. I know every bits and bust of the area. Got everyone nicer presents this year. Better allowance equals better funding. I shall thank my sister for her lovely gift, a Betsey set. We had all of them wrapped already in Rustan's so no more hassle. Christmas, christmas come early, I want to open my presents na! :)

Had a blast with high school friends, two days in a row! Wednesday was spent in UST. I can't believe how big that school is. Why can't UA&P expand its territory? Occupy pearl drive then build a bridge so we can just walk when we're going to shang. Saves me from sweating like hell when walking! The next day I got to spend with mooch. Iba na talaga ang labanan, MATIRA MATIBAY! HAHAH :)

Lighting a bit on the dustful side of my so-called prolific life, a text from dear Cha-Cha got me wondering. Emo is dead. I declare, and I bet you agree with me wholeheartedly. Typical cause of death, brutally massacred by posers. Cha hates being declared an emo girl, although she exhibits it head to toe, due to the horrendous reputation that goes with being deem'd as such. Where does the line of being label'd a poser and a true individual thicken? Idolization flatters anyone but then again, I don't want a doppelganger to float aimlessly above me .

Oh the horror of cyber space. Revealing too much can cause you a lot of trouble.

Okaaaay. I miss everyone like porno :) HAHAH.

Anyhoo, I'm soo soo in love with Cory Kennedy these days. The vibe, the style and all that trash. Trashy vintage is the bomb :) She was here last wednesday with Aoki in Embassy. I missed it. Bohoo. Partied in Embassy last saturday. It was a bad night, thank heavens the dinner was good :) Thanks to my friends, everything suddenly became gooooood :) Btw, I saw Jackie that night in embassy. HAHA. BFF! Things never change:)

At the break of dawn. At the wee hours of the morning. At this horrid affair between macabre and debauchery. I am awake.

Finally after a long hiatus of writing intimate entries, I am back. After seven months of being in UA&P I finally had the chance to evaluate myself. How much has changed? Am I still me? Did I compromise anything for the sake of others? Did college treated me well? Was this truly the right path? And the questions started raining hella good.

College was everything that I expected, well with bits and extra bonus pieces along the way :) After a few tipsy ride and all those money wasted on coffee, I confess that college life treated me well. Amidst the paperwork and shitznit about being delayed and failing math, I generally respected myself a bit more now . Why so? I have yet to change. Still the same old me---life fueled by my greatest love (writing and fashion), photographs inspiring my every move and ultimately, creating a one time revolution for my benefit. I still waste money thru wild expenditures and lastly, I still value connections from high school friends. I believe that drastic change is one's greatest enemy. That's why I did mine thoroughly in a slow-phase magnitude.

People have asked me time and time again by means of subtle questions and glances of course, if I regret going to UA&P. Ha, well this one is an easy question. An outstanding NO. HAHAHA. I did not pass Ateneo or DLSU. I may have pushed my luck and reconsidered but I never did. I told myself from the beginning that If I don't pass the first time then that school is not for me. Surely, I felt bad and moped quite some time when I received news that I won't be able to study in schools were my friends are going but I got over it quickly. (Ang weird no?) I feel so bad that I did not get in not because it was my dream school or that I needed proof to validate my intelligence, but because I'll be in a place where my comfort zones became virtually non-existent. No close friends. No BFFS. In short, it was back to square one. That above all was the scariest thing of all. I wasn't even bitter when I did not get in to other schools that I applied in. HAHA.(Again, weird) Why so? When I was choosing a college, I did not care where I landed. All I wanted was the course. Dream school? Definitely not here and not for another four years :) And lastly, career wise? I only have one thing in my mind. And no it's not writing. HAHA. Big shock no? I mean, I don't see myself doing the whole "front page in Inquirer" shindig. What I love to do is write between reality and fantasy without rules restricting me. You don't go to school to learn how to do that. It's either you got it or you don't. Words are not easy lovers, mind you. People take journalism partly because they want the whole package. Well in my case, kalahati lang ang nais ko. Kung baga sa dyip, sabit lang ako. HAHAHA. What I want to do is to prove to people that fashion is not like call centers. You can make a career out of it, and of course make lotsa money :) Retail is the way to go baby!

Still a long way to go, but I can make it. I will make it.

These words were spoken by a now-college student. Funny how time flies. *sigh* Anyhoo, Christmas break is on! HAHA. Dancing, music and all that pizzazz.:) Jaipur on saturday :)

Le Manila 10:30 p.m.

Between Life And Death Is A Piece Of Artwork.

There were so many stories I heard being passed around school. They say he was drunk when he took that fateful ride. I blocked them all. I want to remember him as Mike, the guy who had the best smile in UA&P. That's how everyone should remember him. Even though people concluded that he was reckless, I'll know inside me that it happened because he was at the wrong place at the wrong time. He was meant to live and create beautiful artworks for the world, but I guess God loves him way too much. He just had to take him away. This is my first time to experience someone dying within my circle of friends because of a silly car ride . I have to thank Mike when I see him. Because of his death, I saw people whom I deliberately ignore in the past. As cliché as this sound, I appreciate and see things better now than before. I realized that everyone has a spark in them. A color in God's palette meant to be admired. I am part of that exquisite masterpiece and so is he. That’s why I think that between life and death is a piece of artwork. It’s the only visible legend someone can leave behind. A body can turn to ashes, clothes can be discarded, but artworks are always caught in between. Not an item, not a possession. It was created for the world. For them to see and realize that this thorn-filled life is also full of roses.

Mike, for now I can only give you a payer. I hope it would be enough. Be happy in God's arm. Don't worry, we'll keep smiling just for you :)


Credits:

Photo by Mike De Larazabal, "The Babe Wore Red".